If you’ve been married for a while or are in a long-term relationship, your sex life may not be what it used to be. On your first date, you may have felt the electricity of new love, and the first time you had sex with your spouse-to-be may have been amazing. That being said, maybe it’s been a long time since your sex life made you tingle with excitement. Maybe you have scheduled intercourse on date nights, and it’s another item on your to-do list.

There’s no reason why intercourse with your spouse can’t be a screaming-orgasm affair. All you need is to spice things up and get your sexual relationship back on track. So, with that in mind, let’s take a look at some ways to get your sex life back the way it was when you and your spouse were young people.

1. Sex toys can be fun.

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Sexual activity, just like everything else, is changing all the time. Don’t worry about not keeping up with the trends that young people enjoy these days. If you’re wondering about how sex has changed and how to have fun with it, the first answer is that young people aren’t embarrassed about introducing sex toys into the bedroom. Consider what might be right for you and your spouse. A ring on the shaft of your penis? A penis extender? A dildo or a vibrator? The sky’s the limit when it comes to finding a fun way to add sex toys to your sexual relationship, so keep an open mind.

2. Don’t spend too much time worrying about penis size.

Far too many men worry about penis size when the truth is that there are penis enlargement techniques that work. From supplements to increase blood flow to the penis and increase your erection to penis pumps, you shouldn’t be worrying about the size of your penis—you should be taking action. It’s an easy enough problem to fix and may end up boosting your self-esteem.

3. Pretend that you’re having casual sex.

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Role-playing can bring an aspect of mystery to your sexual relationship with your spouse or long-term lover. Think about what you imagined when you were in a new sexual relationship. You probably had some moves for figuring out how to turn a hot date into a wild night when you were still perusing a dating app or going on a first date. You can use those same moves now, and it may even be a good idea. Pretend you and your spouse are single for an evening; maybe meet at a bar and pretend you’re having casual sex with a stranger. This will add a steamy element to your sexual intercourse that wasn’t there before.

4. Supplements can help your libido.

If libido is the issue, there are FDA-approved supplements that can jumpstart your sex drive. Of course, you should always check with a doctor about side effects before taking any supplements, but it may be a good idea to look into. These supplements can help both women and men suffering from a lower sex drive than usual.

5. Set the scene.

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Make date night special. Add a few candles, put on some sexy music, and dress up—even if you’re staying in. Offer oral sex, mutual masturbation, or to fulfill another sexual desire your lover may have. By starting by setting the scene for a night of intimacy, you’ll almost certainly eliminate any discomfort and get the sexual behavior and atmosphere going.

Restarting your sex life can be tricky, but it can also be as easy as being open to new things, taking action to aid your erection and libido, and lighting a few candles. Take the initiative, and you’ll be having a good time soon enough.

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